relation betweenbetween🤱👩‍👧‍👧👩‍👧‍👧 mom and daughter

One of the common types of relationships shared by mothers and daughters is called an enmeshed relationship. The relationship is affectionate as the mother treats her daughter as a best friend. Both of them share their interests, feelings, and many other things.While parenting this way, the mother might overlook teaching her daughter proper boundaries. This lack of boundaries would certainly affect the daughter in her ability to grow and have interests and relationships

Role reversal

1. “A mother is a daughter’s best friend.”

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2. “A mother’s treasure is her daughter.”

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3. “There is nothing as powerful as mother’s love, and nothing as healing as a child’s soul.”

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4. “A daughter is someone you laugh with, dream with, and love with all your heart.”

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5. “To my daughter. Never forget that I love you. Life is filled with hard times and good times. Learn from everything you can. Be the woman I know you can be. Mom”

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This pattern in a relationship between mother and daughter usually occurs in the latter part of life. Here, the mother wants support emotionally or financially from her daughter. The daughter’s life is restricted, having to provide everything that her mother requires. Such a kind of relationship is not healthy.

 Estranged relationship

A damaged mother-daughter relationship does have chances to repair the relationship.This is the reason why they usually fights.When women's emotional needs are silent, mothers and daughters fight over whose needs get to be met. And when women's lives are restricted by sexist gender roles that limit their choices and freedom, mothers and daughters fight over their lack of freedom.”

Effects Of Faulty Mother-Daughter Relationship

The first bond that a girl has is with her mother, and so it leaves a great impact on her entire life. If the bond between a mother and daughter is balanced — with kindness, care, love, carefulness, and some limitations — the relationship is respectful and will blossom. But a damaged relationship would have adverse effects.

• Low self-esteem: The first attachment of a daughter is with her mother. And this relationship sets the mark for other relationships. The bond between a mother and daughter willreflect on the daughter’s future. A healthy bond shapes the ability to have self-confidence. But an unhealthy relationship would make her doubt herself, resulting in low self-esteem. On the other hand, even a mother is affected when her bond with the daughter is not going as she had expected.

• Depression: According to a study in the Journal of the American Academy of Child and Adolescent Psychiatry, maternal disengagement could be responsible for depressive disorder in children and young adults . When the daughter does not share a good relationship with her mother, she might tend to have symptoms of depression. A flawed relationship also adversely affects a mother, and might even take a toll on her health.

• Attachment issues: When the major relationship in a woman’s life, such as her bond with her mother, is wounded, she might experience difficulty in trusting and staying loyal to her future relations. She might have insecurities in connecting with others during adulthood.

• Hostility: When the relationship between mother and daughter is dysfunctional, there arise consistent conflicts at home. This leaves an impact on the daughter, and she might become hostile and aggressive even with others.

There might be many reasons for an unhealthy relationship between a mother and a daughter.

But.. as Nancy Thayer said, ‘It’s never too late – in fiction or in life – to revise.’

Though you cannot turn the pages back, you can still fill the next chapter with something good. No relationship can replace a mother’s love for her daughter. That means there are still ways to improve the bond or build your relationship.

Ways To Improve Mother-Daughter Relationship

Take the lead. Irrespective of whatever has happened in the past, either should make the first step to resolve the conflicts of your relationship.

1. Active listener

‘It’s hard to listen when you’re thinking about your own thoughts,’ said Faye E Hage.

Most of the time, you may assume that you are right. Instead of assuming anything, listen carefully to your mother or daughter. Listen without interrupting or analyzing. You can ask questions and get the answers to avoid any more disagreements or confusion. This is the way to connect easily.

2. Walk in her shoes

You never know what your mother or daughter is thinking about until you are in her shoes.when you try to understand from your mother’s or daughter’s perspective, then you may find it easy to reach mutual ground.

3. Open communication

Most of the misunderstandings occur due to no communication at all. Mother and daughter should be open to having healthy and honest communication. For instance, as a mother, if you don’t like your daughter spending the night at a friend’s place,  you should convey it to her by explaining the reasons. On the other hand, as a daughter, if you don’t like your mother’s over-protective behavior, let her know why. softer and emotionally safe communication will surely prove to be effective.

One of the effective ways to have a conversation is to use ‘I’ instead of ‘you.’ For instance, ‘I am feeling sad,’ rather than ‘You are making me depressed.’ Try it and see how it works.

4. Better boundaries

Irrespective of how close a mother-daughter relationship is, there have to be certain boundaries. Mother and daughter can be best friends, but there has to be healthy boundaries. This not only helps in improving the bond but also maintains a respectful relationship.

5. Forgiveness

let go of some grudges and forgive to maintain healthy relationships. A mother and daughter canhave plenty of conflicts, but at the end of the day, work to forgive and forget for a warm hug.

6. Quick heal

Usually, we tend to withdraw after an episode of arguments. If this withdrawal goes on to longthe gap between mother and daughter could increase. Instead of waiting, it is better to talk with each other and sort out the matter quickly. This will heal the wounds faster.

7. Acceptance

The mother and daughter are two different individuals with different perspectivesInstead of arguing and trying to always win the discussion, both the mother and the daughter should accept that sometimes there can be no mutual solutions. It is better to agree to disagree and move on in life.

The bond between a mother and daughter is irreplaceable. Patch up soon, heal each other’s wounds, and become the strongest team of the family.

Do you have any of your mother-daughter stories to share? Let us know in the comments section.

What a Daughter Needs From Her Mom

 with our mothers can be quite tricky and complex, and we all handle them in different ways. Some daughters have amazing relationships with their moms while others deal with unhealthy relationships that cause emotional turmoil throughout their lives. In this piece, we’ll be going over a few factors that both mothers and daughters should consider in order to have healthy relationships.

Having a daughter has been one of the most joy filled experiences in my life. There is no doubt that a mother-daughter bond is special, but as a Mom, there is great responsibility that comes from the relationship with your daughter.

If you have more than one child, you know that each child has needs that are expressed and met in different ways, and beyond that, needs from a mother and father are also different. I always hear emphasis on the father-daughter relationship, which I believe is such a critical relationship for a young girl, but I don’t as often hear about the importance of a mother-daughter relationship. 

1. She needs you to believe in her.

   Being one of your daughter’s biggest fan’s is a great way to instill confidence. Especially when our daughters are young, it is important for them to feel like they can conquer the world. If your daughter doesn’t feel like you believe in her, it’s likely she won’t believe in herself.

   The earlier you can instill belief in your daughter and make her know without a doubt that you have confidence in her, the sooner she will learn to believe in herself. 
   
   

2. She needs you to validate that her worth comes from within; not performance, appearance, or successes.

   Growing up nowadays is brutal. Girls are mean and social media opens a whole new world of false appearances, expectations, bullying, and standards that will never be met. Your daughter needs to know that you are proud of her, think she’s beautiful, and that your love is truly unconditional.

   Just as us moms have; our daughters will make plenty of mistakes throughout their childhood. It’s important to extend grace to our daughters and teach them no matter how many or how big of mistakes they make they are still worthy of love and forgiveness.

   They also need to know that whether they get A’s or D’s or 1st or last, we are still proud of them, still love them, and they are still worthy. We need to teach them how to navigate conflict in relationships and not let that conflict define who they are in a negative way

3. She needs you to model self-awareness and self-care.

   Modeling good self-awareness and self-care is important because it will teach your daughter to be healthier mentally and emotionally. A way to model self-awareness is to acknowledge your emotions. It’s likely your daughter already picks up on your emotions, especially the negative ones.

   Verbalizing your emotions and the reasons for them can be very helpful. You can say “I’m really stressed today because I have A and B to get done and haven’t finished either yet” or “I’m feeling sad today because….”  Your daughter needs to know how to express her emotions in a healthy way and identify why she is feeling the way she does.

   Even in the times we don’t know why we are feeling the way we do it’s important to teach them to acknowledge that too. “I feel really anxious today, but I don’t know why”.